Saturday, February 21, 2009

Can Someone Remind Me Why I Moved Here?

Los Angeles just might be the worst laid-out city in America.

It tries to accommodate the population of a city into a sprawling suburbia. This doesn't work.

If you want to be a city, you need to be a city. There needs to be accessible and safe public transportation and more places to walk.

All of these cars trying to fit into too few parking spaces doesn't work. It's almost comical how poorly planned this city is.

The worst part is, in the twenties, LA was on its way to becoming a functioning city. But then General Motors bought out the entire electric street car system in the Great Street Car Conspiracy so that people would have to buy cars. It worked...for the company at the time. But in the end, we all lost.

This is a tragedy not just for environmental reasons. But because it makes LA a really shitty place to live. If they could move people around the way they do in New York, Chicago, London, Paris, or anywhere in Europe, this place could really be great. Instead, it's inconvenient and massive amounts of time are wasted every day trying to find parking. Not to mention the damage to our environment, and even to our own well beings, given the lack of human interaction and the dangers of driving.

Guess what, guys? I miss New York.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Last Waltz

I just performed in my last show at UCB New York. (tear)

It's off to LA now!

Monday, February 9, 2009


I've noticed that over the past year or so, I've been getting more and more blog readers. I'm judging this solely on the rising number of comments you guys are posting.


This worries me, though, because I'm not sure anything I write is worth reading.

In any case, I've narrowed down the potential reasons why more people are reading my blog.

Here they are:

-A growing number of people like me.
-A growing number of people hate me.
-More people have free time, due to unemployment.
-You're still confusing me with Alison Becker, the chef.

Chris Brown

I'm sure you've heard, but I don't believe the charges.

The guy doesn't even drink, and he's too smart for domestic violence. I'm positive these charges will be dropped.

Plus, why would you hit someone when you could just DANCE THEIR FACE OFF?

The Future

I had lunch the other day with the super rad Ann Shoket, editor-in-chief of Seventeen magazine. This touched on a childhood fantasy of mine, sInce I was obsessed with Seventeen when I was in junior high.

But I really want to give props to the Hearst Tower, New York City's most environmentally friendly building to date. It's amazing, and it boasts eco-friendly aspects from soup to nuts, including a rainwater waterfall that cools the lobby. Pretty awesome.

Oh, and guess which floor Seventeen is on.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Superbowl Recap for Girls

The red team lost.

That hot quarterback is actually 37 years old!

The yellow line isn't there in real life.

Sometimes, African American men have Irish last names.

Bruce Springsteen shoved his balls in your face.

You ate too many wings, and your boyfriend doesn't think you're pretty anymore.