I went to an art show today and made my first real art purchase.
After drinking the free wine, I somehow thought I could afford it.
But what I really learned today is this: Never discuss art in public.
Every person I walked by - even if they had something valid to say about a piece - sounded like a pretentious asshole.
It is simply impossible to sound cool, colloquial, casual, intelligent, substantial, eloquent, and/or not at all annoying when forcing your views on an inanimate object out loud and in public.
That's why art is so expensive: so you can bring it home and do that in the privacy of your own home, without making a fool out of yourself.