Thursday, April 10, 2008

Dear Coach John Thompson III

Dear Coach,

I've been meaning to write to you for a few weeks now, but to tell you the truth, I've been scared. I'm sure you hate me right now, and I hope you'll accept my apology. I am truly sorry.

But I can explain. You see, it wasn't really my fault. It was the Wu Laundry Service on 19th Street in New York City.

You see, I don't normally drop my laundry off at a service. Why? Well, Coach, I don't like the idea of strangers touching my underwear. You understand, right, Coach? But, I decided to try to conquer that fear by starting off small....maybe dropping off some old t-shirts first. And so, the week before the NCAA tournament started, I dropped off a small bag of laundry to Wu Cleaners. In that bag was my lucky Georgetown T-Shirt.

Now, Coach, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "Alison, you stupid, stupid fool! Why would you take that risk?"

But, Coach, I had worn the lucky shirt at a Big East tournament game at MSG, and I wanted it to be fresh and clean for the Big Dance.

But, you know what, Coach? I messed up. I waited too long to pick up the shirt, and when I finally went back, the cleaners were closed. Who knew, Coach? WHO KNEW?

Now, I feel like I let everyone down. Not just you, and the team, but everyone. The undergrad in DC who surely donned his lucky Hoya hat. The alum in Texas who lined up his beers in front of the TV with the labels all facing East. The fan in California who turned the light switch off and on 25 times before tip-off.

I'm sorry.

Listen, Coach, I know better than anyone the impact that these things have on the game.

And, when we lost after the first round to that little school from NC, I know what you were thinking.

And I know what you said to the team back in the locker room:

"Fucking Becker."


Sincerely Sorry,
Alison

3 comments:

Heather said...

So it's YOUR fault that they lost? I had Georgetown going all the way in my pool. Fuck you, Alison! You owe me twenty bucks.

Mark said...

I took my 11 year old son to a Buddhist Temple yesterday for the first time, not just so that he could acheive some degree of enlightenment and experience new things, but also because I no longer give a shit what his radical fundamentalist freakin' cult survivalist So Baptist mother has to say about it, and in a way I think my experience is like you losing your lucky shirt at the cleaners

Matthew said...

it was the second round.
p.s. your SO LAME for not even a mention of you dropping your LOST recaps. So hollywood....