Sunday, June 17, 2007

"Kill Your Television"...

....is the name of a Ned's Atomic Dustbin song.

Also, I don't have cable.

No, seriously. I don't. I didn't have it growing up either. I DID have it in college, and shortly after. But for years now, I have lived without MTV, HBO, A&E, VH1, and all the rest. In fact, I hardly watch tv at all (except for Lost, really). Friends are baffled by this. When I was young, I watched tv religiously. I've seen every episode of Family Ties, The Cosby Show, and even Parker Lewis Can't Lose.

But, now, I just get so much more done when I don't have 17 shows to catch up on.

And, for this, I have been interrogated, ridiculed, and ostracized.

Until now.

It is exactly one week since the end of the Sopranos, and people are still walking around in a tizzy, as if they've been ripped off for the past eight years. From what I've heard, the juicy culmination of plot ended with a lame fizzle. And, to all of the viewers who put their heart and souls into their televisions every Sunday night, to all of the people who paid $150 a month to Time Warner Cable so they could see a fat guy who can barely breathe properly unrealistically screw another hot skinny Jersey girl, to all of the people who condescendingly judged me by saying "You don't watch the SOPRANOS?!" ....

To all of those people, I politely bow and say:

Sorry, fuckers. Looks like I won.

3 comments:

Wylie said...

Frustrating is only catching the first two installments of a "Mathnet" caper on "Square One" and missing the conclusion. Catharsis was found in reruns of the A-Team and 3-2-1 Contact.

Ah, 80's TV programming.

ithinkyoureamazing said...

I think you're the best! Keep it up.

Jerell said...

Now, ironically, the only "mob" influenced show left on television is According to Jim.